Weekly Update
Sep. 19th, 2014 07:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jessuisamericaineSo much has happened in the past few weeks that it's hard to cope and understand what has happened. Between my own personal life and work, everything seems to have mished together once again. I'm going to start with work so I can unwind a bit before my busy day tomorrow. Like last year, work is insanely busy. I love what I do and the people I meet. However, not everything is great as I put it sometimes. Sometimes I keep learning about how horrible people can be in the city and it is really making me sad. I don't understand why in the world where people are struggling to live, that people can be so mean to each other. Maybe I'm just not one who can deal with negativity really well. But if I've learned anything these few weeks is that I need to take the negatives and somehow turn it into a positive. It hard for me not to jump to a negative idea. It's just in my personality to assume the worst so I can put 1000% of my effort into fixing it. It isn't a bad thing but one can't make a mistake that often. As for me, I feel like I should /never/ make a mistake. I want to be perfect at everything I do but even I know that isn't realistic. But with that expectation, its so hard for me to hear criticism. For example, if someone says we did bad on an event, I feel like I'm going to lose that business forever. I start panicking and then I'm unable to function for a good day then I get back on my feet. But I wish that it didn't take me that long. It also sucks that I'm learning things by mistakes. I wish someone could just teach me, I can just take notes, and I can just not make that many mistakes. But according to my dad, that is his method and I just have to keep going with it. It's a hard way and it makes me more stressed out, but I am learning much faster and it's sticking as well. My only worry is that, if he magically isn't here anymore...under some really UNEXPECTED circumstance, I will have a melt down like no other for way too many reasons. I don't feel like I can stand on my own right now. I don't like that feeling. I ALSO NEED TO STOP BEING SO HARD ON MYSELF. THAT IS DEFINITELY A NOTE TO SELF. People make mistake. Just find a way to fix the situation and move on. LEARN THIS WELL.
As for my personal life, I'm happy. For the first time in a long time, I can say that I feel happy with my friends and my own personal life. Despite all this work hell that I'm going through. Despite all the negativity that I'm experiencing, I have friends who will magically make my smile just by saying hello. I'm also insanely grateful that my best friend actually lives closer to me now. It feels amazing just to be able to have lunch weekly instead of just...every other month (if even). I don't know, something about her presence and her voice calms me down and makes all this work hell bearable.This is a side note, it feels silly but I get insanely excited by the idea of just being able to come home and just talk immediately through Skype. Haha I feel like a child again.
I've also accomplished something recently that I didn't think was possible. I hit 3 miles in 35 minutes! Starting from someone who suffered asthma and could barely run a mile to someone you can make it to 3 miles, make me very proud. I never thought this day would come despite all the big talk of joining a marathon in 5 years. (Closing in on 4 now). But The small things right?
Oh, this coming Tuesday, I'm also taking the Dale Carnegie Class. Needless to say, I feel super excited. I want to learn again but this time about something I feel like could benefit my personality and work. A lot of things I really do need to learn about social/work etiquette since I have such an open personality that sometimes I'm actually not sure what is socially acceptable and what isn't. I hope to learn a lot since I feel like I can always be a better person.
That is about it for now. I should probably start working on Henry since NYCC is coming up. Derp derp. I'll get to that eventually.
PEACE~
As for my personal life, I'm happy. For the first time in a long time, I can say that I feel happy with my friends and my own personal life. Despite all this work hell that I'm going through. Despite all the negativity that I'm experiencing, I have friends who will magically make my smile just by saying hello. I'm also insanely grateful that my best friend actually lives closer to me now. It feels amazing just to be able to have lunch weekly instead of just...every other month (if even). I don't know, something about her presence and her voice calms me down and makes all this work hell bearable.This is a side note, it feels silly but I get insanely excited by the idea of just being able to come home and just talk immediately through Skype. Haha I feel like a child again.
I've also accomplished something recently that I didn't think was possible. I hit 3 miles in 35 minutes! Starting from someone who suffered asthma and could barely run a mile to someone you can make it to 3 miles, make me very proud. I never thought this day would come despite all the big talk of joining a marathon in 5 years. (Closing in on 4 now). But The small things right?
Oh, this coming Tuesday, I'm also taking the Dale Carnegie Class. Needless to say, I feel super excited. I want to learn again but this time about something I feel like could benefit my personality and work. A lot of things I really do need to learn about social/work etiquette since I have such an open personality that sometimes I'm actually not sure what is socially acceptable and what isn't. I hope to learn a lot since I feel like I can always be a better person.
That is about it for now. I should probably start working on Henry since NYCC is coming up. Derp derp. I'll get to that eventually.
PEACE~
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Date: 2014-09-20 11:40 pm (UTC)congrats on the running record!!! that's so impressive ;w;
STAY STRONG YYYOOOOSHHH